north star metrics don't have to be about your business

I was recently interviewed by an MBA student, as part of an academic research study into how micro business owners and sole traders like me 'do' resilience.

During that conversation the topic of north star metrics came up - if you're not familiar with this, it's the concept that there's an overarching single KPI or target that everything in your business is related to achieving (i.e. being the no1 college in England; maintaining 5* review average amongst customers; etc).

I shared how mine was not to do with my business, but rather being able to keep supporting my family: when I started my (mis)adventures in self-employment in 2005 I was my family's sole breadwinner. Which meant all parts of my business were focussed on earning enough money to support ourselves as a household. Then in 2017 I started my unpaid caring adventures for what's now become several family members, which means that all the decisions I make in/about my business now have to relate to how I can keep financially paying the rent whilst also having the flexibility to support their changing and evolving needs.

This isn't perhaps uncommon for people who are self employed to have their work and personal life so intertwined. But the conversation made me wonder about what might happen if we started to be less polarised in general about conversations that relate to our work and 'life' - after all, for many of us, there's a constant re-mixing of how we can best honour our responsibilities to our employers/clients, and those to our families.

This isn't just an abstract idea, but one based in recent research from Carers UK, showing how the family circumstances of 600 people every day are changing in ways that mean they can't find ways to find the new 'mix' they need, and so are forced to quit their jobs:

https://www.carersuk.org/press-releases/research-more-than-600-people-quit-work-to-look-after-older-and-disabled-relatives-every-day/   

There's a cliched adage that 'we manage what we measure', so if we started to measure family and life metrics of our people within our financial and other performance metrics as businesses, might we see more engaged workforces that are also easier to retain the skill and talent of?

happiness as a freelancer

Amongst the messages in my inbox last month that landed on world happiness day (20th march 2026), was a question: what makes you (me) happy as a freelancer?

Happiness may not be as easy to spot as you might think?

I initially thought it would be easy to run off a long list, but quickly realised that my first ideas were actually more about how freelancing means I'm able to be more useful and helpful to others than I might be able to if I were salaried - but does that make me happy?

So I recast my eyes and mind over the list I'd started to compile and found 3:

3 types of happy

1) chances to travel - and if I'm lucky, with enough slack around timings with clients and train timetables to allow me to briefly dip into a new museum or gallery (as those things make me happy). However, as my unpaid caring responsibilities have grown over the last 8 years, there's increasingly less opportunity for me to be able to travel around the country as easily as I once did...

2) Working From Home means I more easily surround myself with plants than I'd be able to in an employer's offices.

3) the variety of clients and work I do means that while there'll always be some that I start to struggle with / don't enjoy the work so much, at least I know that they're not my full time, ongoing work (as some people have to face each day with bullying colleagues, and work they don't enjoy, but need to remain in to afford to pay rent, etc).

Happiness is there as a freelancer - but you may have to work to find it 

So - happiness: it can be an elusive thing, and maybe the moral is that it's on us to work on making sure we can recognise it when it happens, and try to actively create ways in which we can keep reminding ourselves about it on a daily basis (especially if we're also amongst the approaching 1 million freelancers / sole traders who are also unpaid carers).

As always - credit to people where it's due for prompting my blog posts. In this instance its Jenny Holliday, who's post on world happiness day prompted me to reflect on the above:

https://substack.com/home/post/p-191264082 

    

the worst of all worlds?

There's a pervading message that starting up your own business gives you more control of your life - you get to choose who you work with, when you work, etc. All of which helps reduce the stress of being at the beck and call of a boss (who you may not like).

But of course, there's a balancing cost to this control which isn't talked about as much: irregular income, no holiday/sick pay, no automatic pension contributions, etc (which means that various researches are starting to find that being an entrepreneur may not actually be that great for our mental health after all...).

Which means when it comes to working, there's a(n over-simplified) choice available to us:

1) work for someone else - which may limit our enjoyment, cause stress, but offers regular pay and time off;

or

2) work for ourselves - which gives us more freedom and choice, but means less security of income to pay the rent / buy food with, etc.

What I based my choice on (and the cost of this)

As I enter the 21st year of being in business for myself, I'm starting to wonder if I somehow haven't accidentally set myself up to 'enjoy' the worst of both of these options...

You see, my particular business model is based primarily on being an associate to other agencies and approved provider lists (I'm usually paid by other people for the work I do with client organisations). This means that while it may be easier for work to come to me, I have less choice in it, it may pay less, and it's usually structured so that I'm part of a managed team under a project manager/boss - just as if I were an employee (with all of the usual strains, pressures, and politics involved of such).

This model of working is based on my values of trying to be more accountable and transparent in how I work - but highlights that our values come at a cost: although there may be work coming in for me, and there are more checks and balances to check the quality of my work, it's often in a way that means I need to act as an employee would (with all the stresses of that) but without any of the benefits that being an employee would offer (no sick / holiday pay, etc).

Why I seem to be working in ways that make no sense

I can already hear some of you thinking "if you don't like it so much, then why not change the way you work?". Well, dear reader, that would mean I have to compromise on some of the values that define me. I'm therefore sharing this here not for sympathy, but to illustrate that in all of our choices, there's always a trade-off somewhere...

It's also shared in hopeful encouragement to others who are also thinking about their own respective business models / ways of working - it's up to us to work out how far we're willing to accept the trade offs of the choices we have. 

So while it may feel tougher than I'd like at times, running my business in a way that continues to buck conventional wisdom is my choice, and one that I regularly recommit to with eyes wide open. It's only me who has to sleep with my conscience at night: what I'm ok with in my business model won't be ok for you (and vice versa) - but shouldn't we all regularly pause to check that our business model isn't accidentally starting to make us become people we don't like?

NB - I always try and offer credit where its due: this particular post was inspired by Tom Jepson, and one of his 'subscriber only' YouTube lives.

time to ditch the fetish of becoming a 'financially sustainable' business

In a social/networking session with fellow freelancers I was part of recently, a recurring theme amongst my fellow self employed, who are in their first few years of trading, kept coming up - namely a desire to become 'sustainable' (aka creating a pipeline of assured regular work).

Let's quickly clarify something about this - this isn't unique to freelancers.

While most businesses make it through their first year, most won't make it past 3. https://www.statista.com/statistics/285305/new-enterprise-survival-rate-in-the-uk/ 

This 3-year threshold is possibly why, if your business makes it past 3 years, it's officially recognised as being financially sustainable: 

https://www.freshbooks.com/hub/startup/how-long-does-it-take-business-to-be-successful#:~:text=list%20really%20expanding.-,Year%20Three,three%20years%20in%20the%20distance.  

However, within 2 years of reaching this magic milestone, 20% of these 'sustainable' businesses will then have had to close their doors for good... Just because you've made it to 3, doesn't automatically mean you're set for life.

So - if all businesses equally struggle to keep going (regardless of it they're large or micro), why do we keep chasing the dream of reaching a promised land of 'being financially sustainable'? The data referenced above shows this will never happen - but that's surely to be expected when you remember that markets, people, and fashions, etc keep changing all the time around us (so what we once thought everyone would want to buy, is now an anathema... disposable plastic cutlery, anyone?).

Surely it would be better to ditch the expectation of reaching a goal that's always going to be unachievable, and instead reframe our language and ambitions to something more realistic and honest: maybe something to do with cash reserves, and how long we can run for if we suddenly run out of paying customers (which would reduce the threat of facing imminent eviction from our homes, and therefore go a long way to helping our peace of mind and achieving a healthier state of mental well-being...).

why I always answer "whiskey" when people ask me about how I manage my mental wellbeing

As sole traders and small business owners, it's generally accepted that our mental wellbeing and health is under greater pressure and strain than our salaried counterparts':

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8393630/ 

https://www.vice.com/en/article/avaw7j/freelance-mental-health-self-employed 

One of the outcomes of the Covid pandemic, is that we all suddenly felt we had enough of a shared excuse to start to talk about this more openly and honestly - and having done for so for a year or two, a habit seems to have been established that it's now taken as read that any network, professional body, or business support programme will create space for us to have conversations about the stuff that's going on in our heads.

Inevitably, when such times arise, and I'm in the room (physically or virtually), someone always asks people to share with everyone else what their personal practices are for their mental wellbeing. And once you've been part of a few such conversations, you'll start to spot recurring trends: walking; listening to music; cooking; and such like. 

But my response always seems to shock and stun each such group when it comes to my turn.

I talk about whiskey. 

When I recognise that my anxiety and stress is building, I sometimes pour myself a whiskey - and then see how long I can take to drink it: not in terms of speed, but in terms of the length of time.

You see, a good whiskey is distilled to be savoured and enjoyed slowly: if you drink it too quickly, you miss out on the flavours, aromas, and sensations that people have spent generations developing the skills to impart in these small glasses of amber liquid.

And as most of the other examples people share in how they self-manage their own mental well-being involve practices that force them to slow down, to be more focussed and immersed in a single activity, the way that whiskey is crafted would seem to equally achieve these broad approaches of others' practices. 

A good aged single malt whiskey forces you to do in order to fully appreciate and enjoy it (and with inflation, recession, etc it's getting harder to afford, so I also don't want to squander it!).

But - I'm also keenly aware that for some people, alcohol is not the right solution for them for a number of valid reasons. 

I'm not sharing my love of whiskey here in an attempt to try and encourage people to drink/drink more, but to highlight that in how we manage our mental well-being there are lots of options and ideas you can adopt and try. What works for you, might not work for me, because our respective brains are wired differently to each other (see pic - a scan a few years ago highlighted that there's a slight 'hole' in mine that most other people don't have!)

When we feel overwhelmed and overloaded it can feel easier to 'go with the pack' and do what everyone else does in such times of rising panic. But don't be afraid to experiment and find what works best for you, and when you do - don't feel you should apologise for it because other people don't agree with it: celebrate it and use it to try and help you enjoy the best life you can. 

could legal company forms help protect my mental wellbeing?

The date of my publishing this post on my blog (Oct 10th) marks World Mental Health day - a time when there are floods of other posts, tweets, emails, etc being circulated, so I don't expect that this will catch too many people's attention, but I've always stated that this blog is in part my 'thinking aloud space' - and this post relates to me 'thinking aloud' about an aspect of my mental wellbeing, and how I try and best manage it.

Firstly - as background to to the title of this post, I've always said that I prefer being a sole trader instead of incorporating myself as a limited company (as conventional wisdom would suggest I should). 

This isn't just because I try and be unconventional, but also in remaining a sole trader, I have to pay more tax on my income and earnings that a company director or salaried employee would (and I think that paying tax is actually a good idea). It also means that technically, I've unlimited personal liability - I can't easily "wash my hands" of a problematic contract by simply dissolving a company (in whose name the contract etc, would be, meaning that nothing of the fall out would legally stick to me). As such, it forces me to try and take greater care in how I approach my work and also hopefully sends a message to those I work with that in seeking to establish trust and rapport with them, I'm willing to make myself very vulnerable personally. This element of personal risk is something I also try and further manage through my professional insurance policies, and how I seek to structure and maintain relationships with each person and organisation I find myself working with.

But it's world mental health day, so I'm taking this opportunity to revisit the above position about my not being incorporated to review it from a new perspective - my mental wellbeing.

As a sole trader, parent, carer, etc etc (we all have multiple identities - some of which are more secret than others...), I'm very conscious of trying to best manage my own health and wellbeing, including my mental health. And this list of roles I hold each brings its own tensions, stresses, anxieties, etc that aren't always easy to 'turn off' - but I've always sought to harness what some might see as negative or harmful emotional states that arise from them, to generate responses that help motivate and keep me moving forwards.  

Now, from time to time, I try and take stock of how I'm doing in managing the above - always with a view to trying to see if there might be ways to change a practice or habit that could help  further mitigate or reduce a recognised stressor in/on myself.

And it's the idea of company forms that I'm currently trying to consider to this end - a limited company exists as a 'person' separate to me. It's therefore that person, not me, who would sign contracts, agree terms and conditions, etc - so in the event of the worst coming to pass in my delivering a piece of work (the client decides to sue me), then I could give notice of dissolving the company, and not be concerned about the spectre of potential personal bankruptcy.

However... that's something of a 'nuclear option': I'd only be able to use this fall back position once, because if so 'activated' in that worst case scenario, then all my other business activities linked and associated to and through the company would also cease to be.  And if I then recontacted everyone in my current/original guise of being a sole trader, it would look like I was trying to duck responsibilities, be unethical, and generally exhibit the sort of behaviours that as a society, we decry when we see some larger corporates doing...

And then there's the question of how I'd mitigate the risk that having such a legally distanced structured from the people I'm working with might mean in terms of my becoming complacent in my relationships with them - one of the main reasons I'm currently maintaining my status as a sole trader.

 

So, on balance, I'm not sure that having identified this option I can actually adopt it - in theory it would offer me an assurance against the 'worst case scenario', and so help reduce a stressor and anxiety. But in practice if I ever needed to enact it, it would mean that I'd have to shut all my work down and not be able to easily restart working in the way I am now - in much the same way that if I were sued as a sole trader (and my insurance providers felt I'd not acted with sufficient degree of professional conduct with the upset client in order to cover the claim), I'd not be able to easily restart working in the way I am now. 

'Killing' a company that I owned could also impact on my personal credit rating (in the same way that getting personally sued might also) - so that consideration also balances itself out.

  

But it's an interesting perspective on the question that every sole trader and freelancer faces at some point - of whether to incorporate themselves as a limited company; but from a very different starting point. A perspective that seems timely with it being world mental health day.

However, as will all of my 'thinking aloud' posts that I make here in this blog, I'd be interested and keen to hear what holes people might be able to pick in my above 'workings out', and if there's anything that I've missed in thinking this through?